By Vessi

As you should have realized by now, unless you are incredibly dim and/or live under a rock, you know that there is a new magazine in town. Many questions have arisen from this, and we decided to track down the real story behind it, and what we came up with was:

A few weeks ago, kimiskoolaid and Vessi, aka Kim and Vanessa, reportedly went up to John with a demand, or a “request”, asking for their own magazine. When they were rejected the first time, they were persistant, finally to the point that they started beating and threatening John, until he gave in to their demands.

Now, when we heard this, we thought this seemed like a bit brutal and violent for such young, lovely ladies. However, we weren’t ready to toss away the theory completely. We went around asking a few questions in and out of the office, hoping to either confirm the rumours or to reject it and here is is a bit of what we got:

Masterwizard (at home): I was knitting a sweater at home, when suddenly, I heard some yelling coming from upstairs! I was worried at first, but I remembered that John loves to sing in the shower, so I ignored it and continued on with my knitting.

Tom Brady (in Hogsmeade): You’re asking me about John? How about we talk about me? *wink wink*

Simone_Jowett (spying through a window): I’M NOT DOING ANYTHING! I mean *cough*, yes, I saw those two, they gave me this lock-pick, see? *holds up lock-pick*

Even after all this, we were still unsure of whether or not we were faced with the truth or not. Yes, we have seen John walking around in his bright pink crutches, apparently having broken his leg while “skiing”, but we still are skeptical about his words. Our little story may be true after all, but, my dear reader, that is for YOU to decide.